There are a lot of things that I struggle with. Be it patience, anger, submission, discipline.... I believe in all of these things. I know that patience is a virtue, that unbridled anger is wrong, that I should willingly submit to Mark, that I should be disciplined in any number of given areas. I believe all of those things to be true because I believe God's Word.
There are times I feel like a complete and total failure, a hypocrite. I’m willing to bet that several of you often feel the same way. There are times these titles are self imposed. Times when it’s just simply how I feel. There are other times when they're imposed on me by others and their expectations of how I should be.
I'll be the first to admit that I'm a "hypocrite". Perhaps a more accurate way of saying it is that I may appear to be a hypocrite at times. I think there's a distinct difference between being a hypocrite and being someone who fully believes something, struggles in those areas, and is in need of grace.
I'm that person.
But believing doesn't mean we're always good at the things we believe.
I've had this post on my mind for quite awhile. It's sat as a draft for months. And here recently I've been hit hard. The past few weeks have given me multiple opportunities to be a hypocrite. And Satan basks in it. He's always there to rub it in, to attempt to make you think you don't really believe God's Word. He likes to make you think it's pointless to even try.
He likes the word "failure."
But it's not. I tell you, it's not pointless to try!
I've come to the conclusion that sometimes (not always) it just doesn't matter what other people think. What matters is what I know to be true.
Just because we're not where we'd like to be in certain areas doesn't exempt us from continuing to work towards being better.
I fail. I'm impatient. I'm unkind.
But I still believe. I believe all the more that I'm a sinner in need of grace and I am so incredibly thankful that He graciously offers that to me.
There comes a time when you have to sit down and truly evaluate things. "Am I really a hypocrite?" "Does 'failure' really encompass who I am?" And once you answer these questions honestly, the solution is still the same. Be your answer yes or no, the answer is one in the same.
Get back up!
You will fail. You will stumble. You will look to the right or left instead of straight ahead.
Get back up.
Failure can only occur when we allow it to. When we choose to wallow in self pity, refuse to continue striving, running the race that has been set before us.
Get back up.
If you have to crawl, do it. Because the rewards and satisfaction of knowing that Christ can and will sustain you through your failures is invaluable.
Get back up. Otherwise.... failure awaits.